Non-comunicating contacts

momat · Post by **momat** » Sun Feb 08, 2009 5:03 am

Recently I have found a couple of connections with relations who say "Yes I am interested and I will get back to you" but never hear from again.
I know that we would both benefit from shared information but I can't force them to reply.
How frustrating as I know they would answer some long standing questions

Anyone else been there ?

LesleyB · Post by **LesleyB** » Sun Feb 08, 2009 11:21 am

Hi Maureen

a couple of connections with relations who say "Yes I am interested and I will get back to you" but never hear from again

Yes, I've been there. Not sure why it happens. I suppose our tree is of importance to us, but maybe only of passing interest to others, even those who are related! I'd agree it is frustrating, especially when you know there are possible answers to questions out there... especially those sort of answers which are not going to be revealed by birth, death or marriage doocuments, those "family stories" kind of questions, along with, of course, the family photos you have never seen which they probably have hidden away at the back of a cupboard, that they didn't think were of any interest to anyone.

Best wishes
Lesley

Post by **SarahND** » Sun Feb 08, 2009 12:56 pm

Hi Maureen,
There is a distant cousin in Hawaii who "probably" has a photo of my elusive great grandmother in a box in her garage, but she never quite gets around to looking. This has been about 4 years now... There is a limit to how many times I can prod her

Very frustrating!

Regards,
Sarah

Post by **Tracey** » Sun Feb 08, 2009 1:29 pm

I think also with sites like genesre people get caught in the moment and add say their father / mother or grandparents and get cold feet when someone does contact them. I have had a situation over the last year when i contacted someone (and ive worked out who she is to the named person) and she didnt reply - fair enough but then a month or so i get a message and they say that they are too busy to reply at then moment but will get back to me

But then again there could be a number of personal reasons ( ill heath, divorce ect ) why someone doesnt reply - thats what i tell myself in those frustrating moments

speleobat2 · Post by **speleobat2** » Sun Feb 08, 2009 4:22 pm

Sometimes it's just that a lot of people don't like to write letters or feel that they should write one to you but are too busy to do more than a note so you get nothing. My sister and I have had some luck by writing or emailing them asking just one specific question:

Do have any pictures of...?

Did ? ever tell you about...?

I found a letter (card, picture) from/of ? Do you remember...?

Carol

momat · Post by **momat** » Sun Feb 08, 2009 11:24 pm

So very frustrating

These people probably have the answers that are in the Modern records that we can't access ,sitting in the drawer somewhere,
Like "what was the name of so and so's mother and where did they live .
I feel that if you are going to add you basic data to a Genealogy site you should at least respond when someone "finds " you .
I know that what I have, I would be very willing to share with these new family members as it has taken a lot of time and effort
to get this far and I would like to pass it on to someone who may benefit from this knowledge
Oh well, I will keep hoping