When I first started researching my family history, I went into it little bit blinkered, I would say, I was not prepared for some of the shocks, surprises and discoveries that lay ahead. Not only that, I was also burdened with the pressure of knowing things and whether I should share them or not? I am sure a lot of you have been or will be in a similar position yourself?
Family Secrets and what to do with them?
https://chiddicksfamilytree.com/2019/12 ... -the-ugly/
Family Secrets and what to do with them?
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Currie
- Posts: 3924
- Joined: Fri Jun 22, 2007 3:20 am
- Location: Australia
Re: Family Secrets and what to do with them?
Hello Chiddicks,
When you say it is a family secret is it one held by you alone that you are keeping from the rest of the family, and you are concerned about telling them, or is it a concern about publishing it and telling the world. If there is a particular member of the family you would be concerned about knowing the facts then you would have to make sure that they never take up genealogy. For all you know the rest of the family may already know about it and been keeping it a secret from you all these years.
If its a secret worth telling it may have a use in raising a slight spark of interest in those many family members who can usually only manage that “here he goes again” look when you mention family history.
Where did the information come from? Was it supplied to you in confidence? Did the person or organisation who gave you the information say not to tell anyone. If something is in the public domain and can be obtained by anyone either freely or by paying for it then it cannot be a secret.
If a secret is weighing you down you can easily get rid of it by telling it to someone else. Just tell them its a secret and not to tell anyone. It will then be removed as a load from your mind. It’s almost as good as a lobotomy. Eventually, if the story is worth telling, it’ll get around, but that won’t be your problem.
You can’t burn history, the way that books were once burnt. You can’t turn a sinner into a saint, that’s the job of the obituary writers and the eulogists.
That’s enough for now,
All the best,
Alan
When you say it is a family secret is it one held by you alone that you are keeping from the rest of the family, and you are concerned about telling them, or is it a concern about publishing it and telling the world. If there is a particular member of the family you would be concerned about knowing the facts then you would have to make sure that they never take up genealogy. For all you know the rest of the family may already know about it and been keeping it a secret from you all these years.
If its a secret worth telling it may have a use in raising a slight spark of interest in those many family members who can usually only manage that “here he goes again” look when you mention family history.
Where did the information come from? Was it supplied to you in confidence? Did the person or organisation who gave you the information say not to tell anyone. If something is in the public domain and can be obtained by anyone either freely or by paying for it then it cannot be a secret.
If a secret is weighing you down you can easily get rid of it by telling it to someone else. Just tell them its a secret and not to tell anyone. It will then be removed as a load from your mind. It’s almost as good as a lobotomy. Eventually, if the story is worth telling, it’ll get around, but that won’t be your problem.
You can’t burn history, the way that books were once burnt. You can’t turn a sinner into a saint, that’s the job of the obituary writers and the eulogists.
That’s enough for now,
All the best,
Alan